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MFR "Donkeys and Elephants" [message #186248]

Sun, 04 May 2008 20:59

K-dub
Messages: 306
Registered: May 2004

Music Lover

I've put "Colors of the Day" back into production ... for in addition to the vocal lackluster (pointed out by Jimi), the arrangement isn't really kicking it for me either ... particularly the energy drop following the solo section. It needs "more", and I've not yet figured out how to get it there ... so I'll shelve it while I continue forward.

Instead, I was curious as to whether this might be an appropriate alternate album opener?

Donkeys and Elephants

In particular, I'm slightly concerned as to whether the vocal is a little too harsh sounding and needs retracking.

Any comment about anything, though, is thoroughly appreciated.

Best,

Kev

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Long Days Passing Fast
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Re: MFR "Donkeys and Elephants" [message #186249 is a reply to message #186248 ]

Mon, 05 May 2008 13:40

studiojimi
Messages: 2870
Registered: April 2004
Location: Hollywood, CA

Producer

the bass is so out i had problems telling if it was a shuffle or straight eighths

the vocal is too hot

for me

the organ is too loud too a lot of the time

i'd like more rhythm gtr

this is supposted to be a rock group

rundgren word sport the keys like this maybe but he'd make sure the gtrs were dialed in

the background vamps are a bit boring and also they are too loud

the song has potential

but the intro needs to be defined first and formost

bass is quantized very weird for me

http://www.jimmyhunter.com/images/sj.gif

MY MYSPACE
MY STUDIO

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Re: MFR "Donkeys and Elephants" [message #186250 is a reply to message #186248 ]

Mon, 05 May 2008 16:46

K-dub
Messages: 306
Registered: May 2004

Music Lover

Thanks Jimi-

By "out", do you mean out of the mix too far or out front to far?

Kev-

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Re: MFR "Donkeys and Elephants" [message #186251 is a reply to message #186250 ]

Tue, 06 May 2008 00:13

studiojimi
Messages: 2870
Registered: April 2004
Location: Hollywood, CA

Producer

K-dub wrote on Mon, 05 May 2008 14:46

Thanks Jimi-

By "out", do you mean out of the mix too far or out front to far?

Kev-

no OUT as in out of time

out of feel

MY MYSPACE
MY STUDIO

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Re: MFR "Donkeys and Elephants" [message #186252 is a reply to message #186248 ]

Tue, 06 May 2008 10:02

K-dub
Messages: 306
Registered: May 2004

Music Lover

Ah ... got it. That's an interesting observation, and I'd not heard it mentioned before.

Personally, I'm not in love with the part either ... and I think I'm going to retrack it.

The bass here is a keyboard bass part, and as such might be a little to "clunky" for the piece. Sometimes, the right move is to do it over.

Thanks Jimi!

Kev-

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Re: MFR "Donkeys and Elephants" [message #186273 is a reply to message #186248 ]

Sat, 24 May 2008 18:17

MDM,
Messages: 8
Registered: May 2008

Intern

This song reminds me of Pete Townshend's solo stuff.. in a way..

the mix is NOT a master in any way.. it is a loose demo.

the melody, and loose structure is good, and it creates the basis for more song sections to be added.

you need some more breaks, and the intro is INTERESTING but has NO relation to the song..

forget INTERESTING.. as a rule, go for meaning whenever you can.

as far as the words.. I did NOT understand a single word you said, and I am not going to play the song back because you really didn't do your homework in the first place..

CLARITY is essential in expression.. you must get your point across at least in one dimension on the first playback... at LEAST make the words intelligible..

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Re: MFR "Donkeys and Elephants" [message #186279 is a reply to message #186248 ]

Mon, 26 May 2008 14:06

K-dub
Messages: 306
Registered: May 2004

Music Lover

Spot on ...

Are you my son in disguise? His criticism of my lyrical prowess mirrors yours. I normally try not to publish until its "right" and ready though.

I don't like the lyric to this either ... and the main vocal needs a complete redo on the tracking.

I don't blame you for not listening again. It's not ready.

btw ... ALL the songs posted here are works in progress ... and I hold little sacred on a W.I.P.

Thanks!

Kev-

[Updated on: Mon, 26 May 2008 14:08]

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Re: MFR "Donkeys and Elephants" [message #186284 is a reply to message #186279 ]

Mon, 26 May 2008 16:14

Tannoy
Messages: 45
Registered: May 2005

Serious

Hi again,

to my ears (just mixingwise):

The lead-vox seems to be some kind of hi-middy and lacks of low end, I could imagine that some correction there would make the whole thing a bit more glued together.

Cheers,

Marco.

myspace.com/marcopoprock

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Re: MFR "Donkeys and Elephants" [message #186290 is a reply to message #186248 ]

Mon, 26 May 2008 22:39

K-dub
Messages: 306
Registered: May 2004

Music Lover

I completely dislike the whole lead vocal track. I need both better lyric and better tracking.

I'm in total agreement with everything offered so far in this thread.

Kev-

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